Leafdapple said:
It might be that our current paradigm of sexuality doesn't even closely map to reality so such a thing is just impossible.

^ this. I feel like the language we currently use to define attraction/orientation is probably extremely lacking and a lot of the work done to understand it isn't really getting much of anywhere.

but honestly, I feel everyone would be happier if they, just kinda, cared a bit less. I mean-- let yourself exist, learn who you are on your own time, and, like, you can use words to describe who you are, but don't get attached to a lable, and certainly don't let yourself be defined by what words you think apply to you or not.

dba_afish said:
but honestly, I feel everyone would be happier if they, just kinda, cared a bit less. I mean-- let yourself exist, learn who you are on your own time, and, like, you can use words to describe who you are, but don't get attached to a lable, and certainly don't let yourself be defined by what words you think apply to you or not.

What matters is your moment to moment attraction, anyway. Having a label can help you make sense of it, but as you said if you treat the words as defining your behavior then you've got it backwards.